By Ruth Houston

New Yorkers who suspect their mates of infidelity  may be tempted to use some of the latest technology to find out if he or she is really cheating.

Suspicious mates now have an endless array of surveillance equipment that will allow them to spy on the suspected cheaters in an effort to find out the truth.

Do-it-yourself spy equipment is now widely available, reasonably priced, and includes many variations of the following:

• Listening or recording devices to eavesdrop on the cheater’s conversations.

• Hidden cameras in all sizes and shapes, often disguised as common household items, to secretly view what the cheater is doing.

• GPS tracking devices to monitor where the cheater goes, or the location of the cheater’s car.

• Keyloggers and other software or gadgets to install on the cheater’s computer to monitor their e-mails, Instant Messages, chats, or other online activities.

What many people don’t realize is that by using certain types of surveillance equipment to spy on a cheating mate, they could be breaking the law.

How You Could End Up In Jail

New Yorkers who use devices to listen in on a suspected cheater’s phone conversations or monitor their internet activities, could end up behind bars.

It’s not illegal to buy such equipment, but there are strict laws regarding the use of surveillance equipment or electronic devices to monitor or intercept someone else’s communications without their knowledge or consent.

The laws apply to both telephone and computer communications and include phone calls, text messages, e-mails, instant messages and chat room logs.

In New York, hacking into someone’s computer account or tapping their phone conversations is a class E felony punishable by up to 4 years in jail. Laws vary from state to state, but other states have similar laws.

Both online and offline stores that sell surveillance or so called “spy� equipment post disclaimers stating that the products they sell or are not to be used illegally. But it’s your responsibility as a customer or end user to determine what constitutes legal use of this equipment in the state where you reside.

You Can Also Be Held Liable for This

You can even be held accountable if someone else illegally uses the equipment on your behalf.

Most New Yorkers will recall what happened three years ago, when Jeanine Pirro ran for the office of New York State attorney general. Pirro became the subject of a federal investigation because she was caught on tape trying to get former New York Police Commissioner Bernard Kerik to bug the family boat to determine if her husband was having an affair. Both Pirro and Kerik came under the scrutiny of the law.

So if you hire a private investigator, or persuade a friend to illegally use the surveillance equipment on your behalf, you could be liable too.

In view of this, if you’re a New Yorker and you don’t want to risk going to jail, you need to find an alternate way to spy on your mate.

Fortunately, if you suspect infidelity, there are ways to spy on the suspected cheater without running afoul of the law. Knowing what to look for is the key.

How to Spy Without Breaking the Law

A good infidelity reference book can help you find out the truth. There are a number of good infidelity books on the market, but Is He Cheating on You? — 829 Telltale Signs is the only infidelity reference book which documents practically every known sign of infidelity, including the subtle signs people usually overlook. The signs are conveniently grouped into 21 major categories so you can easily find the signs that apply to your marriage, your relationship or your mate. Despite the title of this book, most of the signs in it apply to both cheating women and cheating men. The e-book version of Is He Cheating on You? — 829 Telltale Signs sold through Booklocker.com, has a special 10-page section for men with cheating wives or girlfriends entitled Is SHE Cheating?

All too often clients call and ask about our ability to capture evidence of infidelity inside the work place. The unfortunate reality about affairs in the office is that even if people suspect that it is going on, the cheaters are likely to be very cautious so as not to get caught. Obviously if people are ducking into an empty room for a tryst, no private investigator is going to be able to document that activity. Despite the obvious barriers to success in capturing workplace infidelity, there can be an opportunity. In some instances people will go into work early to hook up or stay late and wait until everyone else has left. After these evening hook ups, the cheaters will often leave together and do things like kiss in the parking lot, go to a motel if others are working late or drive somewhere to fornicate in the car. A good investigator can take advantage of these opportunities and get you proof.

A large number of companies are selling vehicle trackers over the internet for use to monitor your spouse or partner. Unfortunately, there are a growing number of state laws that prohibit using these devices in many different situations, including in some states, married people using them to monitor their spouse when investigating infidelity. Even if your spouse found the device and would not press charges against you, if it is found in the  wrong situation,once the police are notified, they may charge you anyway.

We recommend getting a legal opinion before using such a device.

The device used to make traveling through toll booths faster and easier has a new use.

Many people are using their E-Pass or Sun-Pass records as proof a significant other has strayed, WESH 2 News reported.

The beeping sound as you pass through says you are automatically paying your toll, but you may pay more than that if the toll records can prove infidelity.

You tell your spouse you are one place, but E-Pass data says you are someplace else. In a bitter divorce battle, this can be the road to ruin.

“Those records are not private, they can be subpoenaed,” divorce attorney Elaine Silver said. “Anybody can’t get them, but the spouse who is looking for them can issue a subpoena to the E-Pass authority and bingo, there goes the lie.”

“I don’t think that’s right. You should have a right to privacy,” E-Pass user Jeanette Gabay said.

People said they are stunned to learn that a device they purchase for convenience in their hectic lives could just as easily be their un-doing in court if it proves they were unfaithful.

“I think it’s not good because you know, that’s, uh, personal. She doesn’t have to know nothing about where I’m going or nothing,” Miguel Corujo said.

Orlando, Florida

“Unless you commit some type of heinous crime, then yes, then I think that those records should be turned over to the police, but if it’s something private like divorce or something like that, that’s ridiculous,” Gabay said.

“Our credit card records are public, our checking accounts are public and when you’re going through a divorce you’re life is under a microscope,” Silver said. “There truly is no privacy, it’s very hard to hide.”

Many people said they are surprised that a toll collection system can also register cheating hearts.

People having an affair in Italy would be well advised in future not to use their car for illicit assignations.

An Italian judge yesterday ruled that wives or husbands who suspect marital infidelity are entitled under the law to bug their spouse’s car in the search for incriminating evidence.

The ruling arose in Brescia, northern Italy, where a private detective agency specialising in infidelity cases offered to plant hidden microphones and satellite tracking devices “in a couple of hours� in the cars of suspected spouses, at a cost of up to €1,500 (£1,000).

After some of the devices were found police charged 22 people – including private detectives and mechanics as well as the jealous spouses – with “invasion of privacy�. Yesterday, however, Lorenzo Benini, a judge in Brescia, ruled that to plant bugging devices in a car was “not a criminal offence�.

He said: “However disconcerting this may be, I find no penalty under the law for intercepting private conversations or communications in a vehicle. It is not illegal.�

The judge said that the law forbidding bugging applied only to homes, with a penalty of up to four years in prison.

Judge Benini acknowledged that the loophole was “a cause for alarm�, but he insisted that “the law is the law�. He said that he was obliged to acquit the 22 accused, but suggested that parliament might “take another look� at privacy laws in Italy and tighten them up.

In a country where corruption is rife, there are fears that the loophole could also be exploited by those engaged in other forms of espionage, industrial or political.

The wrath – and torment – of cheated husbands or wives is a constant theme of Italian cinema, from Divorce, Italian Style with Marcello Mastroianni to Amore mio, aiutami (Help Me, My Love) starring Monica Vitti.

In a separate case yesterday, the Court of Cassation, the highest court of appeal in Italy, ordered an “obsessively jealous� husband not only to leave the marital home but to move to another town altogether to stop him trying to control his wife’s every move.

The court said that the husband, named only as Roberto under privacy laws, had in effect imprisoned his wife, Maria, by forbidding her to leave their home at Lecce, in Puglia, southern Italy, and installing a video surveillance camera outside the house to make sure that she obeyed.

It said that he had also obliged her to have his mother to stay in the house whenever he spent a night away.

The appeal judges rejected his plea that his actions arose from his “loving attentions� toward his wife. Corriere della Sera said that the two judgments showed that despite Italy’s reputation for a relaxed attitude to matters of the heart, marital jealousy was “stronger than ever�.

A survey in Donna Moderna, a women’s magazine, said that 92 per cent of Italian women would not forgive their husband for betraying them. The survey was taken after the resignation this week of Cosimo Mele, a Catholic MP from the Christian Democrat party, after it emerged that he had spent a night at a luxury Rome hotel suite with two prostitutes, one of whom was taken to hospital with a cocaine overdose.

Only 8 per cent of women questioned said that they would be understanding if their husband or partner were caught in a similar situation. Mr Mele, who denies taking drugs, blames his behaviour on the loneliness of life as a politician.

The Rome prosecutor has opened an inquiry into the case, saying that the prostitutes’ accounts of events differed in key respects from that of Mr Mele.

Home bugs

In Britain law enforcement agencies are required to seek warrants to place bugs or taps but private citizens are not. This opens the door to all forms of espionage whether personal. professional or political. So Britain’s cheating spouses must also be careful where they conduct their secret trysts. But would-be spies must weigh the risks – victims do have recourse to the civil courts under European legislation

New York, NY 10019 July 23 2007

Today is Private Eye Day.

As the author of an infidelity book packed with hundreds of telltale signs of infidelity that suspicious spouses and significant others can find on their own, infidelity expert Ruth Houston rarely recommends using a private eye to catch a cheating mate.

Houston’s book, Is He Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs documents practically every known sign of infidelity, including the subtle signs most people usually overlook And they can all be found using nothing more than your own eyes and ears, your personal knowledge of their mate, and the information in her book.

However, Houston, concedes certain circumstances warrant a suspicious mate hiring a private investigator despite the facts that there are many telltale signs they can easily discover for themselves.

Houston, founder of www.InfidelityAdvice.com says, “Some individuals should never attempt to find proof of infidelity on their own. Certain character traits or personal idiosyncrasies will cause people to view even the most innocent behavior as a sign of infidelity. So rather than jumping to conclusions or falsely accusing a spouse or significant other of cheating, it may be best to employ the services of a private eye.�

According to statistics, 85% of women who had a “gut feeling� that their husbands were cheating, turned out to be right. However, Houston cautions, “Intuition can be a very powerful indicator of infidelity, be sure you know the difference between intuition and insecurity. Your suspicious may be totally without merit. Falsely accusing your mate of infidelity can be just as damaging to your relationship as infidelity itself. So be sure you’re on solid ground.�

Houston says your suspicions may turn out to be groundless if you:

• You are suspicious by nature.
• You have a natural distrust of the opposite sex.
• You have issues with jealousy.
• You are emotionally insecure.
• You suffer from low-self esteem.
• You are paranoid.
• You have an overly active imagination.

“If any of the seven statements above apply to you, then you should probably hire a detective to check out your mate. It will be impossible for you to remain objective or open-minded about whatever you find.� says Houston. “You should also hire a licensed private eye if you require court admissible proof. A professional can conduct a fair and impartial investigation, and provide you with the documented proof you need.�

Private investigators are not cheap. Expect to spend several hundred dollars depending on the service you require. Hourly fees start at around $75 and can go as high as $200 or more per hour. Most require a retainer up front equivalent to a minimum of several hours work.

If you’re reluctant to spend that kind of money, then your best bet is to get a copy of Houston’s book, Is He Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs because it lists practically every known sign of infidelity. Why pay someone to find out something you can easily discover yourself? The signs are conveniently grouped into 21 major categories so you can easily find the signs that apply to your mate. Despite the title, most of the signs in the book apply to cheating women, as well as cheating men.

Even if you decide to hire a private eye, Houston still recommends that you first do a little digging on your own. The more basic information you can provide the investigator with, the more quickly and efficiently he or she can work, and the lower your final cost will be. Look for a licensed investigator who specializes in infidelity, spousal, matrimonial, or domestic investigations, as they’re sometimes called.

For more information about infidelity, cheating mates, signs of infidelity and extramarital affairs, visit www.InfidelityAdvice.com

About Ruth Houston:

New York-based infidelity expert Ruth Houston is the founder of InfidelityAdvice.com and the author of Is He Cheating on You – 829 Telltale Signs. Frequently called on by the media to comment on infidelity issues in the news, Ruth Houston been quoted in USA Today, the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, the Los Angeles Times, the New York Post, Cosmopolitan, Chatelaine, iVillage, MSN Lifestyle, Reuters, UPI, AP, ABC News.com and numerous other print and online media. She has been a guest on The Today Show, Good Day New York, CNN, 1010WINS, Fox News, NBC News, ABC News, BBC, CBC and over 320 radio and TV talk shows worldwide.

To interview infidelity expert Ruth Houston, call 718 592-6039 or e-mail InfidelityExpert @ gmail.com

Ruth Houston (infidelityexpert@gmail.com)
Infidelity Expert and Author
Lifestyle Publications
P.O. Box 730797
Elmhurst, NY 11373
Phone : 718 592-6039

www.InfidelityAdvice.com

Who said that wireless devices can’t be easily hacked?

Well, maybe it’s still not that easy to drop spyware on a stranger’s cell phone, but apparently it’s not quite as difficult to sneak a peek at whatever it is that your child, spouse or employee — or anyone else who is dense enough to pass you their phone for a few minutes — has been up to on their handheld.

A Taiwanese company named Vervata released a new version of a program named FlexiSPY on June 12 that promises the ability for people to track a wide range of usage details on Blackberry, Windows Mobile, and the Nokia Series 60 phones, among many other models.

Unlike computer-borne spyware or most real-world computing hacks, the system can only be downloaded by someone who has physical access to a device — but the implications are pretty scary and give you an idea of what types of spying mobile malware may be capable of someday soon.

Among the many capabilities of the program — advertised as a legitimate product for use by concerned parents, jilted lovers or suspicious bosses — FlexiSPY promises the chance for users to silently view all of the SMS text messages and e-mails that have been sent from and received by a phone carrying the application, as well as view their call logs and pinpoint device usage locations.

So much for any hope of privacy kids.

After someone has installed the program on a device it can only be accessed using a password and the software uploads any information it gathers to a secure server via GPRS. This allows for remote viewing and analysis of such contents, essentially giving that person everything but the ability to eavesdrop on the device owner’s phone conversations.

The data can be viewed using either a PC or another handheld device once it is collected, according to the manufacturer. A Pro version of the product also claims the ability for users to secretly turn on an infected device’s microphone from any other phone and listen to their surroundings for clues where they might be, or perhaps who they might be with.

Vervata claims that FlexiSPY has already been employed by large numbers of people worldwide to uncover extramarital affairs, disloyal employee activities, and to allow parents to track their children’s device use.

The company said that the product is also being used by law enforcement officials — presumably to spy on potential suspects — and said that it is similarly helpful as a cost control mechanism, and for supporting compliance and mobile data backup efforts.

“We’ve received numerous testimonials from customers who have caught their spouses cheating on them, their children behaving inappropriately, and from company executives who have used FlexiSPY to nab disloyal employees,” Atir Raihan, managing director of Vervata, said in a statement.

The company stresses repeatedly that FlexiSPY is neither a Trojan nor a virus and doesn’t attempt to hide itself as some other type of program once it is downloaded onto a device.

Rather, the firm is pitching it as more of a parental controls enforcement tool for wireless devices.

“While spying on people may seem unethical, cheating spouses, rogue employees sharing private company data, or unsuspecting children receiving SMS messages from pedophiles are all activities nobody wants to see happen,” Raihan said. “FlexiSPY is just like the various software applications that have been around for years that you can install on your PC to monitor inappropriate activities; we’ve brought that technology to the mobile platform.”

So, the lesson is — watch what you say or write on those cell phones people, you never know who may be watching or listening.

Posted by Matt Hines on June 12, 2007 12:43 PM