A husband having an affair is likely to be one of the most painful and devastating things that can happen to you. Not knowing if your husband is cheating on you or not is equally as painful. Even the prospect of your husband being unfaithful is painful and extremely disruptive. Each of the private investigators at ASG is here to help clients like you with this issue, every day. We know that you need a private investigator to get you proof so that you can move forward with your life.
We all know that both sexes are guilty of infidelity and that blame for a broken relationship is not the fault of a gender, but there are several aspects of infidelity that are more attributable to men then women.
Recent studies indicate that males are more likely to engage in adulterous activity for the sexual experience only, than are women. Although this is not a rule, we do see more instances of men cheating on their wives purely for the physical act of sex. These men are more likely to have a relationship with any willing female and to allow that relationship to end quickly or immediately than are women. Women committing adultery tend to initiate an affair for some “greater purpose” than lust. A woman can find a man for sex any time they want to whereas a man cannot always find a woman willing to have sex with him. These types of cheating men will often have more interest in the physical aspect of the relationship and tend not to get as emotionally attached to their cheating partner in the affair as women do. Experts say that unlike women who undoubtedly fantasize about extracurricular romance but who are able to separate that fantasy from reality; men are more likely to be unable to distinguish between “mental longings” and physical transgressions, many times not realizing the true scope of what they are doing until it's too late.
Signs of a Cheating Husband and Infidelity in General
Statistics say that 85% of women who feel their lover is cheating are correct and 50% of men who feel their lover is cheating are right. If you have suspicious, consider some of the following and be as impartial as possible.
Have you noticed a:
- Sudden increase in time away from home
- Decreased sexual interest with you
- Cheating spouse is often distracted and day dreaming
- Cheating husband or wife is often unavailable while at work
- Cheating spouse attends new functions outside of work or not wants to go alone
- Cell phone calls from you are not returned in timely fashion
- Cheating spouse leaves house or goes to other rooms to talk on the telephone
- Cheating spouse uses computer alone and secretly
- Cheating spouse asks about your schedule more often than usual
- Mileage on car is high yet he / she reports only short distance errands
- Clothes smell of perfume or cologne
- Cheating spouse gets his / her laundry done independently
- Unexplained payments on bank statements
- Cheating spouse has more cash on hand without accountability
- Cell phone bills contain calls with long duration
- Cheating spouse now has a phone card but never used one before
- Cheating wife or husband has unexplained receipts in wallet or purse
- Cheating spouse has suspicious phone voice-mail messages
- Cheating spouse has suspicious cell phone numbers stored or dialed
- Internet web browser history list (this is a record of web sites visited) contains unusual sites
- Cheating spouse begins to use new or free e-mail account
- Cheating spouse is suddenly deleting e-mail messages
You may also want to consider reviewing your spouses credit card bills.
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The next argument made about men and infidelity is that men are “naturally inclined” to try and “mate” with as many women as possible. This argument implies that like some animals, men want to procreate and “spread their seed” to as many women as possible. Whether there is any validity to this argument or not is best left up to the scientific community, but there is no doubt based on our experience as private investigators that more men are able to engage in infidelity with less guilt than are women. (i.e. the guy who goes to the local “massage parlor” once a year, but has no remorse and simultaneously, no feelings for the masseuse/prostitute is somewhat unique to men) This does not mean that some women do not engage in affairs and adultery without remorse, it is just less common. Please understand that despite the threat of AIDS and other sexually transmitted diseases, there is a pool of women out there who like to have intercourse with many men, often with complete strangers, some of whom do it for money. They can be with 250-300 men in a year, sometimes two or three in the same day!
Men also appear to be driven by the desire to feel good and to be with someone that arouses them. They often stray when they find an opportunity to have sex with someone that is “hotter” then their wife or partner or is in some way more sexually exciting. If they perceive their wife as being overweight, out of shape, non-responsive or too crabby, infidelity becomes a much more realistic option. We have heard story after story about a husband who we catch cheating who reports that it is his wife’s fault. “She got fat”; “she only cares about the kids” or no longer cares about having exciting sex. Men like to feel important and desired and when a woman shows an interest, it feels good and they go after it. When a stranger shows an interest in a man, they get aroused. Put a man who is unhappy at home or in his marital bed in that scenario and you can guess what happens.
The last difference is that more cheating men seem to get away with it. They seem to be more capable of maintaining the “norm” at home while carrying on the affair. If the affair is detected, it appears that a wife is more likely to stay with an adulterer husband then the opposite, thus sending the message to the males of our society that even if they do get caught, it must be acceptable because “so and so” had been cheating for years, got caught and his wife got over it. Society also tells men that having sex with as many women as possible is the way to go. Many people adore hearing about the sexual exploits of the likes of Hugh Hefner, Tommy Lee, Warren Beatty, Mick Jagger, etc. etc. Even our president gets caught engaging in oral sex with a young woman in the oval office and he remains married and has become more popular than ever. The ability to sleep with many women is linked to the ideas of having power, status and money, all things that the average husband strives for. As long as women tolerate infidelity on the part of their husband, husbands will likely take advantage of it.
Think about the old “seven year itch” and how the fact that even in times when marriage was deemed to be more sacred than it is now, a husband’s inclinations toward being unfaithful after a period of marriage was so pronounced that it merited its own name.
Something that is not gender specific but is worth mentioning is that in almost all cases of marital infidelity, something is wrong in the marriage. Either the husband or the wife is unhappy and likely both. Someone’s needs are not being met. Something does not work the way they want it to.
We, like most private investigators, charge our clients an hourly rate for surveillance, with mileage and any other investigative procedures being added. Our surveillances are designed to give you the best possible results given what we collectively know about your husband’s activities. We do this in a sincere effort to give you the best opportunity to know the truth and to minimize your cost.
The private investigators at ASG have the ability to watch your husband, monitor who he is with, where he goes and what your husband does, discreetly and confidentially. We can do this through surveillance, utilization of vehicle tracking devices and providing you with software to monitor e-mail, chat room discussions and internet activity.
Although spousal surveillance by a private investigator is one of the most frequently used tools for uncovering infidelity on the part of a husband, each set of circumstances can call for different measures. Some of the other more commonly requested services we provide when investigating infidelity that can be done in conjunction with an infidelity or spousal surveillance investigation are as follows:
- Monitoring the cheater's E-Mail, Chat Room Discussions and Internet Activity
- Tracking the cheater's vehicle
- Asset Searches in Michigan and Beyond
- Electronic Eavesdropping Detection
- E-Mail Tracing
- Computer Forensic Investigations of your computer
- Identification of the “Other Person”
- Child Custody & Support Investigations
Because each case is unique, we recommend that you call us and speak to a private investigator about your situation to better assess which type of investigation would work best for you. The call is toll free and the consultation with a private investigator is strictly confidential. Get the piece of mind you deserve and the ability to move forward with your life.
Call today. 888-677-9700