General information about infielity that does not directly relate to private investigations but may be of value to our readers.
All marriages go through tough periods or stages, but infidelity is something completely different. Some studies find that 15% of women and 25% of men commit adultery while married. However, those numbers are from surveyed participants who actually admit to the betrayal. The actual numbers can be far larger. Infidelity is a game changer and deal breaker for most people, especially considering the health and security risks involved. Fortunately, there are some simple and effective ways to catch a cheating spouse.
Check Their Phone
Cheaters tend to be overly cautious about the evidence on their phones. But that doesn’t mean traces won’t still remain. You need to be equally cautious here since hacking into a phone, even your spouse’s, is illegal unless your name is also on the bill or included under the phone number. However, if your spouse leaves their phone unlocked or you have the passcode, you can easily check contacts, text messages, emails, recent calls, pictures, and even messaging apps to see if specific names or details appear.
Once you find any solid or potential evidence, be sure to either screenshot it and send it to your email, or take a picture with your own phone and save it to email. Delete any screenshots from your spouse’s phone before returning it to its previous place. Evidence you personally gather likely won’t hold up in court if you’re not sharing your spouse’s phone. But at least you’d know.
Hit the Apps
Downloading tracking apps on your partner’s phone can be one of the best ways to catch a cheating spouse. You’ll obviously need to have access to their phone, and it helps if they don’t routinely scan or search their phone for new or hidden apps. But many free and low-cost apps can be run in invisible mode while tracking online sessions, social media and website visits, messages, emails, and more.
Dive Into Social Media
There are nearly 5 billion social media users on the planet. So your spouse likely has at least a couple of accounts they consistently use. Be sure to follow your spouse on these platforms to see for yourself if anything fishy pops up. While your partner may be conservative in their posts and comments, others may be more revealing.
Do Some Digging
Look offline for clues as well. Check their dresser or drawers for receipts or potentially another phone. If you find another device, see if it’s unlocked or contains hidden clues. Look in their closet and check the pockets of jackets, pants, extra purses, and travel bags. And be sure to check their bedside table as well. You may find some solid physical evidence that you’d never find through their tech devices.
Pop In Unannounced
Most spouses know all about the other person’s daily routine. So it’s easy for cheating to occur when that spouse knows you’re too busy or otherwise preoccupied during their fling time. So mix it up. If you have a feeling your partner is cheating, change your routine a bit without letting them know beforehand. Pop in for a surprise lunch at their work, show up early at home, or meet them at the gym sometimes. Just be sure to have a good answer for the sudden surprise before doing it.
Get a Background Check by a Private Investigator
Running a background check on the person you’ve already married and shared your life with may seem silly. But if they’re cheating, the right details can paint a vivid picture of their lies and desperation. A background check by a private investigator can show hidden social media accounts, blogs and paid cheating sites they belong to, hidden bank accounts or assets, and even contact details of side partners or secret kids. Give us a call when you’re ready to know the truth once and for all.
According to The General Survey that spanned 16 years, 76% of American adults consider extramarital sex as “always wrong”. Still, 21% of men and 13% of women admit to infidelity at some point during their relationships. Regardless of surveys, statistics, and outside beliefs, most people feel extreme pain and betrayal over the discovery of a cheating spouse. Technology has made it easier than ever to find evidence of that betrayal, but it also makes it easier than ever to cheat in the first place. So then, how can you find out if your spouse is using a dating app?
Access Shared Devices and Check Browser History
Most dating websites also have mobile app options. So if you see browsing history on any shared device, you can be assured your partner is probably also accessing them on the go. If you know their Google or Apple sign-in information, you can access their browser history on any compatible device that way as well. Just don’t hack into a locked or private device on your own because that’s illegal and not permissible as legal evidence. Sometimes the wording doesn’t give the context away for dating or cheating websites, but other times the purpose of the website is completely clear. Look for websites or app history for site names such as:
Hit Google and Reverse Image Search
Hopefully, nothing will show up in the history search. But that still doesn’t guarantee your spouse isn’t trying to get lucky elsewhere. Google can be their worst enemy in that case. The same can be true for any other browser or search engine you or your spouse may prefer to use. Regardless of which search engine is used, run their name, email address(es), and phone number in the search bar and see what comes up. You can also put any profile picture from their social media accounts or any recent pictures you prefer into Google’s reverse image search to see if they’re on any other sites they haven’t told you about.
Join Popular Dating Sites to Investigate
Feel free to investigate on your own. But don’t join as “yourself”. The last thing you’ll want to deal with while confronting your spouse of cheating is for them to turn it around with proof of you doing the same. Create your own fake profile and adjust it to your spouse’s personal and love interests. Type in your spouse’s features to link your own preferences and see if his name or image pops up. Then let the app do its work to connect you.
Hire a Private Investigator
Before rushing into what family, friends, co-workers, or an online connection suggest you do, consider what’s actually safe and legal in your situation and state. Unfortunately, several legal nuances over privacy can come back to bite you even if you find evidence that your spouse is using a dating app. It may, in that case, simply be more constructive and effective to hire a private investigator. Give us a call when you’re ready to discuss your options.
Everyone occasionally has sweaty palms, a sinking stomach, a flash of clarity, or recurring feelings about a person or situation in life. Those signs can be a gut feeling or intuition. When intuition strikes, it shouldn’t immediately be ignored. After all, true intuition can be right up to 90% of the time, at least at the moment. However, anxiety and paranoia can also provide the same signs and feelings, especially when you’re dealing with a potentially cheating spouse. Fortunately, there are some easy ways to catch the cheater for good, so you can stop feeling like you’re going crazy or being gaslighted.
Most spouses know each other’s schedules and have specific times during the day when they reconnect and spend their family time. But if your spouse is cheating, it’s especially important to him or her that you stick to that schedule. And that’s precisely why you should mix it up! Head over to their workplace for a surprise lunch date. Pack a picnic basket or have reservations set for a special restaurant to cover your tracks. After all, it could actually result in a nice romantic date. But it could also reveal a coworker crush or hidden infidelity.
Engage in Smart Snooping
Almost all Americans today, approximately 97%, own some type of cellphone. And 85% of those are smartphones. Technology makes it much easier to catch a cheating spouse. If you’re going to check on them via technology, keep it simple. Check their phone for hidden or new contacts. Scan their text messages and messaging accounts for intimate or indecent content. And check their social media accounts for new contacts or favorites.
Keep a Journal
Gaslighters get their kicks by using psychological manipulation to confuse their partners and make them doubt their sanity. Many cheaters are experienced or pathological liars. It’s easy to get confused about details when you don’t have them written down in front of you. So document the important things. Keep dates, times, bank records, credit card transactions, and even car mileage in a journal for easy access. A cheating spouse may be able to make you question your emotions, but they can’t ignore documented facts.
Follow Your Gut… Literally
As a last-ditch approach after you have plenty of evidence, you can potentially follow your spouse on your own or enlist a friend for some easy surveillance. However, at no time should you ever attempt this if it might put you or a loved one in danger. If following is a safe option, use a different vehicle or even two if available. Disguise your appearance somewhat, even if you just don a wig, hat, or hairpiece. And never do anything illegal such as trespassing or breaking and entering to get “proof”.
Hire a Private Investigator
The best-laid plans can easily blow up in your face, and even hard-earned evidence can be tossed out of court on legal technicalities. Sometimes, it’s just best to leave it to the pros. The right private investigator for cheating spouses can get the evidence and surveillance you need without sacrificing your time, sanity, or security. Give us a call when you’re ready to get the facts and find out once and for all if you’re dealing with a cheating spouse.
All relationships take consistent effort and communication to work. Still, over 20% of marriages face cheating concerns and surveys and studies continually show men most often instigate the damage. This is especially true at the office where workplace infidelity is known to blossom and flourish. Fortunately, there are some tips and strategies to help you catch a cheating spouse, so you’re not blindsided by your partner’s actions or betrayal.
Pay Attention to Their Work Attitude
Most spouses and significant others discuss, complain, and vent about work situations and/or coworkers. A moderate amount of venting is completely healthy, especially when leaning on your chosen partner. However, sudden changes in those discussions can indicate something fishy is going on. Perhaps your partner has just gotten into a good groove at work. But they could also have indulged in a bout of workplace infidelity. Changes in scheduling and extending work hours can also signal a problem.
Notice Their Personal Improvements
Personal development and improvements can be wonderful objectives for both you and your spouse at any time during your marriage. After all, who doesn’t like to feel more attractive, leaner, and more appreciated by themselves and their significant other? However, there are usually reasons for those changes, and as a spouse, you should know the major reason for those changes.
Check Their Net and Phone Usage
Approximately 97% of Americans own a cellphone, and 85% of those phones are smartphones. That means the majority of Americans have instant access to their phone and text contacts, coworkers, email, social media accounts, and work login info at any moment of the day or night. While that’s great for staying connected and maintaining important life demands, it also makes it a lot easier to maintain flirtation or an affair with a coworker. If your spouse keeps their phone locked, takes it wherever they go, or their phone and net usage are interfering with your marriage, their job duties may not be the only reason.
Visit Their Work Unexpectedly
According to research, over 60% of affairs begin in the workplace. Most spouses involved in those affairs are from relatively happy homes and admit they never believed they would engage in the behavior. But proximity, extensive work hours, and eventual emotional connection and sharing can be the primary factors in workplace infidelity. Most of the time, a cheater will go out of their way to ensure their spouse avoids their primary meeting place. If your spouse is insisting you never visit their work or only around certain times, a surprise visit may be in order to discover the real reason why.
Recognize Home Behavioral Changes and Gaslighting
Sudden changes, both good and bad, can indicate a cheating spouse as well. Pay close attention to any significant behavioral changes when you’re around them. Unwarranted irritation, picking fights, and blaming you for things you’re not responsible for–a light form of gaslighting–are common for cheating spouses. But they might also be more affectionate or attentive as well. Even being more active or adventurous in bed without a clear reason can be a result of guilt or an attempt to through you off the trail. If your intuition is buzzing and you don’t want to play detective on your own, simply hire a private investigator. Give us a call to get the answers you need.
Most Americans have had the terms “for better or worse, for richer or poorer, and in sickness and health” beat into their brains from an early age. But no one really adds, “and until you cheat on me or I catch vibes you’ve been busy elsewhere” to their wedding vows. That’s because marriage vows are meant to provide a positive promise of what you’ll give, not a reminder of your limits. Of course, people change and according to nationwide statistics, over 40% of couples cheat and marital infidelity is the primary cause of up to 40% of divorces. But do men cheat more or do women cheat more likely to cheat and what can you do about it?
Aren’t Men Just the Worst?
Now, hold on ladies before you get your pitchforks out. It is true that in the past we were socially conditioned to at least mentally hold men responsible for marital breakdown when adultery was involved. Movies and media still often hop on the man-blame train when and where cheating is concerned. But the gender-related cheating gap isn’t as wide as it used to be, and it really comes down to age at this point, according to statistics. A major social survey conducted over a 5-year period discovered the younger the couple, the closer the gap. In fact, there was only a 1% difference in the number of male versus female marital cheaters within the 18 to 29-year-old age bracket. Women held the lead there with marital infidelity. The trend widens with age, however, resulting in 24% of males versus 8% of female cheating spouses in the randy 80-year-old bracket.
Why Do Men and Women Cheat at All?
Men and Women may have similar relationship needs, but they tend to cheat for very different reasons. Most people think men cheat primarily for physical gratification. While dissatisfaction at home can definitely play a part, most men actually cheat simply because they feel they can get away with it. And they don’t always cheat “UP”. According to psychologist Robert Rodriguez, approximately 10% of happily married men cheat on their pregnant wives.
That even includes men who find their wives more attractive when they advance in pregnancy. Women, on the other hand, don’t crave excitement as much as they crave peace and connection. Whether their marital infidelity is physical or emotional, they’re drawn to adoration, communication, empathy, and support. Therefore, women tend to cheat “UP”, finding a more suitable mate due to the affair.
What Can You Do if You Discover Or Suspect Marital Infidelity?
Intuition is often spot-on when it comes to marital infidelity. So if you suspect your partner’s cheating, you may be onto something. Pay attention and get your emotions in check. Think about what you need to move forward with proof and with your own happiness. If you’re scared or nervous about gathering information alone, call us to hire a private investigator. We can get the proof you need to help you decide the next best course of action or simply move on with your life.
No one enters a monogamous, devoted marriage with the idea of being betrayed and having their lives torn apart by the person they love and trust most in the world. But according to the American Psychological Association, infidelity is the primary cause of up to 40% of divorces. There are almost always other existing problems that precede an affair, but once that line is crossed most marriages have a hard time recovering. And for many couples, having an affair on either side is the final nail in the coffin. The hardest sting occurs when the loyal spouse is completely blindsided by the betrayal. Fortunately, there are some obvious signs that can help you catch a cheating partner.
Enhanced, Guarded, or Secretive Tech Habits
Most Americans have access to multiple types of tech devices such as smartphones, tablets, and laptops nowadays. They’re required for education, work, socialization, and relaxation. But they’re especially important due to the current health situation. Of course, the extra tech usage makes it a lot easier to cheat on a spouse and also catch a cheating partner. According to a study by YouGov Omnibus, 7% of all adults on dating apps joined to cheat on their partner, and 17% of all adults on dating sites in 2019 were there to cheat. That number rose through the pandemic. So pay close attention to your honey’s tech habits.
Unusual or Unexplained Expenses
Most couples share household expenses or at least have some idea of their regular accumulative weekly or monthly expenditures. So covering the financial tracks of an affair can be challenging. And don’t kid yourself, the cost of cheating can add up fast. According to one study, the average six-month affair can cost over $2,660 due to dates, dinners, gifts, hotel rooms, and other incidentals. If you notice unusual or unexplained expenses, it could be a sign your partner is having an affair.
Emotional and/or Sexual Intimacy Changes in the Relationship
The most intense part of any romantic relationship, known as the “honeymoon stage”, can last anywhere between a few months and a few years. After that, however, most committed relationships tend to stabilize and form stronger emotional bonds that create a more secure and balanced partnership. If your partner has suddenly pulled away and emotional intimacy has suffered or even stopped altogether, that can be a sign that they’re getting their needs met elsewhere. Significant or sudden sexual changes are good indicators as well. Most people assume lack of sex is an obvious sign of infidelity. But guilt can also result in the disloyal spouse also wanting more sex at home to cover their tracks.
Sudden Moods, Avoidance, or Deflection When Confronted about Relationship Problems
It always takes two to make or break a relationship, but infidelity is a solo decision and often one that leads to a one-way ticket straight out of the marriage. Chances are your partner’s smart enough to know that last bit, so they’ll go out of their way to hide the affair. That stress builds up though, and they’ll be more likely to deflect, attack, or avoid accusations or discussions of relationship problems. Give us a call when you’ve had enough and are ready once and for all to catch a cheating partner.
Discovering your spouse has been unfaithful can be one of the most painful, and in some cases unbearable, moments in life. If you’re facing that, know you’re far from alone. According to national statistics, approximately 20% of men and 13% of women cheat on their spouses, and that number increases with age. But those statistics are based on admittance, and the numbers can actually be closer to the 70% mark. Regardless, the fact that you’ve been living and sharing intimacy with a cheating spouse is never a pleasant discovery for a loyal partner. But knowing the pain and devastation that type of betrayal can cause, why do spouses cheat?
Healthy adults don’t need constant validation to feel their own worth, but everyone feels depressed or at least inadequate from time-to-time. Those who don’t receive the validation they need from their spouses during those times often look for it elsewhere, and it can lead to infidelity when the attraction and appreciation are mutual. While that ego boost may feel good at the moment, it’s usually short-lived. That can create a cycle of searching for that boost, cheating, and crashing before coming clean or being caught by your actual partner.
Women are more likely than men to claim emotional neglect as a reason for infidelity, but it can be a serious issue for either gender. Your spouse is expected to provide the emotional validation you need. But when that is gone in a marriage, one or both partners can search for it elsewhere. Emotional connection outside the marriage can evolve into an emotional affair. And that can lead to sexual infidelity.
Boredom or Revenge
Boredom often occurs in even strong marriages, but when it’s chronic or consistent, it can be partnered with the need or desire to seek revenge on the other spouse for their perceived disinterest. That revenge then snowballs into a sexual affair. When the infidelity is just due to boredom, it can also be due to sensation-seeking, a psychological need to feel new or intense feelings to combat the loneliness and regain some personal worth–regardless of the consequences.
Infidelity Is a Family Affair
Children have several influences in their lives, but their parents always lead the pack. When it comes to infidelity, however, children have strong views of the subject through all phases of life. And yet, according to studies, adults who had at least one cheating parent are at least twice as likely to cheat on their spouse or committed partner at some point. While this obviously doesn’t always occur, it is important to know your partner’s family history to realize that your relationship risk factors could be affected.
Sexual dissatisfaction is probably the most common reason for infidelity, regardless of gender, age, or length of marital time. That can include lack of sexual attention in the marriage, differences in sexual needs, desire for extra or multiple partners, falling out of love with your current partner, lack of physical attraction/validation, and overlapping emotional disconnection. If you’re concerned about a cheating spouse or have serious suspicions that you can’t prove, give us a call. The right Detroit private investigator will find the answers you need to move forward with your life.
Maintaining a positive and productive marriage can be challenging. But when signs suggest you’re living with a cheating spouse, the institution can become unbearable. A recent study has discovered that U.S. divorce rates have fallen to record lows of less than 15 divorces in every 1,000 marriages. That’s great for the nation overall, but adultery is still one of the top reasons for divorce. Fortunately, there are some pretty solid ways to catch a cheating spouse.
Go Into Sleuth Mode at Home
A cheating spouse will likely be very careful to avoid being caught, but they’re still human. Most cheaters will get careless enough at some point to leave traces of evidence behind. And that can be enough to give you the answers you need if you know what and where to look for it. Start in the closet, but don’t focus on the obvious. Go through the back and check pants, suit jackets, and bag pockets. Even look through shoes for odd items like extra condoms, receipts, business cards, phone numbers, and other unusual items that can confirm your suspicions.
Then carry on to the garage. As long as you’re legally married and on the car lease, you’ll be able to legally access any existing GPS in the vehicle. Check the patterns, especially stops made right before coming home, to see if your spouse was in fact at the drugstore or if they stopped at that cute coworker’s apartment instead. You can even plant a small bugging device under the driver’s seat to hear phone calls or other private conversations. But be forewarned, that is just for your personal knowledge and it can’t be legally used in court.
Dive Into the Devices
Smartphones have become a basic requirement in American culture, and the US ranks third globally with over 300 million cell phones currently in use. With the current employment challenges, more and more adults are also spending their days and nights wrapped up in their tablets and laptops. But it’s not just work that draws people into their devices. COVID has led to an uptick in online connections, liaisons, and affairs. And according to YouGov, 17% of adults who currently use dating apps admit to using them to cheat on their current partners.
The good news is that your spouse can’t be on their devices 24/7. The bad news is that if they’re locked or history is scoured on a regular basis, chances are they’re intentionally attempting to cover their tracks. If you’re concerned, check the devices. Be aware that you won’t be able to use the information in court if you find it without their permission. But you will have the answers you need and deserve.
Call In the Pros
Infidelity is responsible for up to 40% of divorces. And while 70% or more couples do survive the offense, most of those marriages end up empty and unhappy. You have every right to know the truth, but finding it out on your own can be emotionally exhausting, lead to extreme mental anguish, and in some cases even be dangerous. Why not avoid the trouble altogether and call in the pros? Professional Michigan spousal surveillance can get the answers you need so you can focus on a healthier and happier future.
Every romantic relationship is different, but discovering you’ve been living with a cheating spouse can be a game-changer for many partners. That level of betrayal can burn deeper than a red-hot poker thrust into the gut and not only lead to emotional and mental issues but also physical health and illness as well as the brain and body fight to comprehend and adjust to the sudden blow. The root concern boils down to one simple question: Can your marriage survive infidelity? And if so, where and how do you start?
Make Sure the Cheating or Affair is Really Over
Whether your cheating spouse is a serial cheater or the issue involved just one other person, nothing can be fixed or rebuilt until the infidelity truly ends. But be prepared: the affair may have been as simple as a one night stand, but 50% of marital cheating lasts up to one year, and 30% lasts beyond 15 months. There may be some serious emotional attachment or other complications involved, so you need to decide if it’s even worth it to continue. In many cases, it’s simply best to cut your losses and continue as co-parents or even eventual friends.
Dive Into the Truth
Having deep discussions with a cheating spouse can be difficult, especially since affairs are often cloaked in lies. Your spouse is likely going to try to conceal the details about the affair as long as possible, hoping instead to just let it go and move on. But that can’t be done if you want a stronger, more stable relationship. Approximately 64% of marriages survive infidelity, but nearly 80% of those marriages end up being empty and unhappy. Betrayal burns and you deserve answers, so go to counseling together if necessary to get them.
Work on Underlying Issues
Anyone can talk about the issues or play the blame game, but that only gets issues out in the open or continues the argument. Cheating is not an excuse for a troubled marriage, and that trouble is never one-sided. Marriages take work from both spouses, individually and together. So address the issues to discuss and recognize where and when the breakdown occurred, but don’t stop there. Take action to fix those problems, whether they involve finances, work or socializing concerns, parenting differences, intimacy or sexual issues, etc.
Take Matters Into Your Own Hands
A cheating spouse often gets so used to lying that they start to believe their own recreated existence. They may insist the affair was a one-off or that they’ll never do it again. But statistics have shown that if someone cheats, they’re 3.5 times more likely to do it again. Words are fine, actions are better, but proof can change your life. Chances are you’ll have a lot of doubt and uncertainty even if you’re determined to get past the betrayal. The right private investigator infidelity specialist can do wonders for your stress and sanity. Give us a call when you’re ready for the answers you need.