More Drama in the Case of the Texas Wife Who Ran Over Her Cheating Husband

The AP reported that the famous saga of a woman who killed her cheating husband by mowing him down with her luxury car returns to court Tuesday in a civil case Clara Harris filed against her former defense attorney. Jury selection is set to begin more than three years after Harris filed a lawsuit claiming Houston attorney George Parnham overcharged to defend her in the 2003 murder trial that garnered international attention.

Harris, 50, was sentenced to 20 years in prison for running over her philandering spouse in a hotel parking lot in 2002 after confronting him with his mistress. The lawsuit claims Harris hired Parnham for $75,000 but wound up paying more than $235,000.

Cheating husband pays when wife runs over him with her luxury car.

Should a Private Investigator Help you Find your Old Girlfriend?

Should people enlist the help of a private investigator to find an old girlfriend?
The answer is a resounding, absolutely, and, no way.

That makes no sense, you say.  Well, let me give you some points to ponder before you get upset with me.

I don’t know who you are.  I am sure you are a fine person of strong moral character and certainly a pillar of integrity within your community, but none-the-less, you are a stranger to me.  I have been specifically trained to question anything unfamiliar to me.  Please don’t be offended when I am unmoved by proclamations to the effect of “I’m not crazy”.

You must understand that I have no idea of the circumstances behind the demise of your past relationship.  I am always curious though, if she wanted to remain friends with you, why did she not provide you with her forwarding information?  Never-the-less, I am not always so cynical.  I know that friends lose touch.  I know that people grow up and move away and friendships get lost in life’s shuffle.  If this is true in your case, then nothing will bring me greater joy then to reunite you and your friend, but let’s consider the more sinister side of people and their motives.

At least once a day, I’ll get a call from a seemingly kind man who “just lost his wife” and would enjoy reconnecting with his “first love” just to see how she is and how her life is going.  Well, my first instinct is to be moved by the romance of it all.  How special she must be that she is thought of so highly after so many years……sigh….but I digress….

Suddenly, I am reminded of the harsh reality of “sometimes”.  Sometimes seemingly kind man has a restraining order against him.  Sometimes “first love” is unrequited and would tremble if she thought a private investigator revealed her whereabouts to her ex boyfriend.

As professional private investigators we have a duty to know the intentions of our prospective clients.  We have a policy here from which we never deviate; we will NEVER release our subject’s personal information without her permission.  We also make it our business to know exactly who our clients are so it should not come as a surprise when I ask you for the first 5 or last 4 digits of your social security number on our investigations agreement.  I want to be sure that you are who you say you are.

Okay, with all that being said, let’s assume you’re on the up and up.  Let’s say that you want to know whether your ex is married or single before you decide to contact her.  No problem.  I am perfectly willing to let you know what I believe her marital status to be (this is not free of charge).  If it appears she is attached, you may decide to hold off on contacting her.  We will file her information for future reference in case circumstances change for either of you.

If she is free, one of our female investigators will contact her to offer your contact information, or obtain her permission to release hers to you.  We can also forward a handwritten letter from you, to her.  This allows us to withhold her information while still allowing you to reach out to her.

I’m a huge romantic and a fan of first loves reuniting in the second half of their lives. I just want to be sure that both parties are as pleased as I am about the prospect of becoming reacquainted with each other.  I hope you understand.   I hope you take comfort in knowing that I will protect your information as diligently as I do hers.

Unprofessional P.I.s

I had an opportunity to attend a training for investigators recently and during one of the breaks there was an excited conversation taking place within a group of investigators who were new to the business. They had what sounded like a varied past set of experiences, some being from the military, some from law enforcement and at least one from corporate security. They were having a good time pointing out the “problems” associated with domestic cases like infidelity investigations. In particular, they felt the clients, who mind you are going through a very difficult time dealing with the prospect of their spouse cheating on them and who have no idea how investigations are handled, are not smart enough to represent. The labeled these clients as “morons” and began some excellent story telling about cases where the client was charged a large amount of money but, the investigation failed to yield any results.

This same group then began describing how they often charge such clients hundreds of dollars for “data” about the other man/woman, that is nothing more than database runs that cost $5 and $10, again laughing about the loser clients who buy that info.

At this point I joined the conversation and asked about their practices, areas of specialization, training, office location and staff size. This lead the another round of jokes about how a PI should always take every case that comes their way and simply farm out the work to someone else for a kick back rather than simply telling the client that they do not do that type of work.

This lack of professionalism is a major cause of concern the “real” private investigators, with real offices, real staff, real reports, real training, real ethics policies and a real commitment to their clients.

IMO, if your PI is working from their home office in the basement, run! You deserve better.

Man Admits to Cheating on Wife to Win $50,000 on TV Game Show

In London a man admits to cheating on game show.

London, Jan 20:

Hoping to win 50,000 pounds on a TV game show, a husband owned up to cheating on his wife by having an affair and visiting a prostitute on his bucks night.

Stuart Brandwood admitted his scandalous antics as he was hooked to a lie detector on game show Nothing But the Truth, where contestants must answer 21 questions truthfully in front of their spouse to win the jackpot.

Apart from confessing an affair and bedding a prostitute, Brandwood said that his wife Amanda was not the best lover he’d had.

She has, however, forgiven him, and the couple, from Warrington in Cheshire, insist their relationship is ’stronger than ever’.

Before the program, Amanda submitted two suggestions for questions to ask her husband. One was: ‘Have you had an affair while you have been together with Amanda?”, the other: “Have you ever paid for sex abroad?”

When his wife asked him the questions, Stuart thought he had no option but to confess, rather than have her find out on the program.

“I went to Amsterdam on my stag night. My mates decided to get some money together for a prostitute in the red light district. I was very drunk,” the Scotsman quoted him, as saying.

Stuart said that the worst part was when he was asked whether his wife was the best lover he had had, to which he replied: No.

“That was unbelievably awkward and she really grilled me afterwards about who was the best lover,” he said.

“I had a life and a past before Amanda. She knew that because I was 30 when we met.

“But the question that has really kept us together was: ‘If you could have an affair and not get caught, would you do it?’ and I answered honestly, ‘No.’ So I think that proved how much I love her.”

Amanda said: “Because of everything he has confessed to, there have been a few tough times for us recently, but now he has a clean slate and I have forgiven him. I was more angry with him for not telling me about those things and keeping them a secret for years than what he actually did.

“We always had a strong relationship, and we must have done to have got through this. Amazingly, it has made us closer. We certainly talk a lot more now, she added.

Cheater Websites: Are Websites that Promote Infidelity and Cheating Wrong?

Wednesday, January 09, 2008

Cheater websites have become commonplace on the Internet. Websites such as ashleymadison and meet2cheat specialize in promoting discrete affairs between married and committed people. Make sure your partner is not frequenting these sites by checking their computer history. Also, watch for escort sites such as theeroticreview or bigdoggie to find out whether your husband or boyfriend is paying for prostitutes, perhaps endangering your health.

Studies which were conducted recently revealed that 45-55% of married women and 50-60% of married men engage in extramarital sex at some time or another during their relationship (Atwood & Schwartz,2002 – Journal of Couple & Relationship Therapy). According to a cheating poll of over 1,900 women conducted by, 39% felt that alibinetwork was the sleaziest website on the net, followed by adultfriendfinder, ashleymadison and fastseduction.

There are several ways for the cheater to cheat on the Internet and there are several degrees of cheating on the Internet as well. It is imperative to mention that the Internet is particularly successful in putting people in contact as it provides a way to interact with less inhibition than when meeting somebody in real life. Places to meet people on the internet are in the millions and they can be classified into the following categories: Chat rooms. (MSN and Yahoo are the most used); Friend networks. (Hi5 and Orkut are very popular); Direct contact through chat profiles. (Looking through the profiles of MSN members); Sites to match couples (Perfectmatch, match, etc) and Relationship sites (Passion, Adult Friend Finder, etc). It is important to note that not everyone who chats or even meet in real life is a cheater. The Internet is a great and wonderful resource but we all must take responsibility on how we use it.

Finally, there is another set of people, especially those who live in different towns, who practices cyber-sex. Cyber-sex involves into phone sex slowly, but the chances of cheating are less probable as they need to travel to meet each other. Even more, experienced cheaters will contact people in those places where they know they will be traveling soon. Married and committed people who utilize cheater websites want to have their cake and to eat it too. Unfortunately, this is always unbeknownst to the unsuspecting partner. Sites like Ashley Madison tap into a very profitable place within the online personals arena by bringing honesty to the dishonest practice of cheating. They allow people an alternative to a traditional personals site where they may have to lie and say they are single, thus giving potential mates the wrong impression—yet they make light of lying to a spouse or partner.

Married people seem to seek other married people to give themselves a sense of added security in an inherently insecure position. Their preference to cheat within their own camp is based on assumptions about people with spouses: They will not demand too much of the other person”s time; they will be less invested in the relationship since they already have one; they are more understanding about a last-minute cancellation because the wife is sick and the kids need to go to soccer practice. Ideally, all those things are true, but in the real world, there are no guarantees and having everything out in the open does not mean there won”t be drama. These assumptions make all married people out to be normal and stable, and all single people end up looking like needy, unreasonable fools with no boundaries desperate to fall in love and break up a marriage.

By Stephany Alexander


Stop infidelity

Farizaa Sabreen

Infidelity is one of the most wrenching experiences a couple can tolerate. It can destroy families and above all it causes soreness not just to the betrayed, but usually to the cheater as well. Unfortunately the number of infidelity is rising in our society.

You can call it cheating, having an affair, adultery, infidelity, or breaking your monogamy promises, it affects relationships deeply. But it does not have to mean an end to the relationship.

Extra marital affairs are not always a sign of a troubled marriage. Some spouses yield to the temptation of an extramarital relationship as the result of experiencing unusual pressure over a normal lifestyle change, such as becoming a parent or a lonesome. For this, infidelity can occur in blissful marriages as well as unhappy ones.

Extramarital affairs, because of their secret nature, go unspoken. This silence has forced those involved to cope with incredibly complex problems with no support and advice.

Unlike TV’s portrayal of affairs, real “triangles” involve a great deal of repentance, confusion, anxiety, and soreness. In the end all members of the triangle are affected, for better or worse. Whether the marriage survives or the lovers form a new couple, everyone involved in the “triangle” will have been dramatically and permanently affected by the extramarital experience.

The fact that affairs are wrong, even considered to be a sin, has been ingrained into us through our social, cultural and religious upbringing. Yet despite the social and religious disapproval of them, they have been an ever-present phenomenon for us to deal with.

Every relationship hits a hurdle, or worse, a major crisis, that demands significant change if the relationship is to survive. This type of affair was not planned before hand because of a bad marriage. These affairs usually just happen.

Infidelity may be the worst of human experiences. It is usually a symptom of a weakness in a person or marriage, which can be corrected. Relationships are not built or destroyed by single events. In order for a marriage to have any hope of survival when an extramarital relationship threatens it, the involved spouse must recognize that the relationship is wrong and be willing to end it.

Who Has Affairs?

Unhappy working mothers and stay-at-home mothers often snag a much younger man. Stay-at-home moms have affairs with the neighbors. Stay-at-home wives get bored and join gyms and meet boyfriends while the husband is away working all the time, doing his own thing.

When married men are forced to live far from their families, they often start a new relationship.

We tend to think that only bad people have affairs or only people in bad relationships. But no one is protected from an affair.

Why it happens?

The reasons for infidelity are as many and as varied as the people involved. Professor S I Mullik, Psychiatrist of Lab Aid Hospital, has categorized the reasons for extramarital affairs as follows: Excitement, curiosity, falling in love, desire to escape or find relief from a painful relationship, boredom, desire to punish one’s partner, etc.

Women seem to be drawn into adulterous relationships initially through emotional attachments, while men are more likely attracted sexually. Interestingly, each gender tends to assume that the other is acting out of the same drive, as they are likely to themselves.

How it can be prevented?

Couples can’t avoid affairs by making threats as to what they would do if it happened. People don’t feel free to admit being attracted to someone else. If they don’t admit these attractions, then they won’t admit being tempted. If they don’t admit being tempted, then they certainly won’t admit it if and when they finally act on the attraction. The effect on the relationship is to cause it to be filled with jealousy and doubt.

If you suspect your spouse is cheating, Tanya Islam, a socio analyst has provides few tips to help spot it: any type of change in sexual relationship, missing money, change in schedule, request for separate vacations, increase in fights, etc.

So what do you do? Sneak a peek at his/her cell phone. Who has he been calling? Or, better still, try and catch him/her red handed. Surprise him/her by dropping in at his/her office when he says he’s working, or by coming home when s/he thinks you’re out of town.

There are many types of extra-marital relationships, and while all of them are terrible betrayals of the trust and love between the couple, it directly affects the chances for survival of the marriage.

Like other affairs, extra-marital affairs are loaded with romanticism, morality, mythology, and intense emotions. They’re not really about sex, but about pain and fear and the desire to feel alive. They’re also about betrayal. Such type of affairs need not necessarily wreck a marriage or result into divorce.

Before you can decide what to do with the affair in your life you need to know what it means and what are its types.

Is it just ‘Emotional outbreak affair’, or ‘Emotional-Sexual Affair’?

The faithful spouse has worked hard for the marriage; but no matter how hard they work, the unfaithful spouse is going to have an affair due to their own scarcities.

If you are the “other woman”, whom he’s stolen not only your heart but also your brain- you should know that majority of married men are not planning to leave their established lives to begin one with you. So, if you may feel that he’s your soul mate, think again. A real soul mate would not set you on the sidelines. He wouldn’t allow it, let alone entice it. Even if your married man decided to leave his wife and family for you, that doesn’t guarantee success.

If you are the “other” involved in an extramarital affair, considering getting involved in an affair or are in the process of ending an affair, this is a place for you to speak freely and honestly with others who experience the same highs and lows you do.

Give yourself time to work through your anger, resentment and hurt over the whole issue. Talk to your partner about it and let him know how let down you feel and how you will require time to heal.

If he hasn’t already ended the affair or is dithering over it, give him an ultimatum. Be firm and let him know that you are willing to give it another try but he has to cut off all ties with his lover.

E Pass Records Catch Cheaters Red Handed

The device used to make traveling through toll booths faster and easier has a new use.

Many people are using their E-Pass or Sun-Pass records as proof a significant other has strayed, WESH 2 News reported.

The beeping sound as you pass through says you are automatically paying your toll, but you may pay more than that if the toll records can prove infidelity.

You tell your spouse you are one place, but E-Pass data says you are someplace else. In a bitter divorce battle, this can be the road to ruin.

“Those records are not private, they can be subpoenaed,” divorce attorney Elaine Silver said. “Anybody can’t get them, but the spouse who is looking for them can issue a subpoena to the E-Pass authority and bingo, there goes the lie.”

“I don’t think that’s right. You should have a right to privacy,” E-Pass user Jeanette Gabay said.

People said they are stunned to learn that a device they purchase for convenience in their hectic lives could just as easily be their un-doing in court if it proves they were unfaithful.

“I think it’s not good because you know, that’s, uh, personal. She doesn’t have to know nothing about where I’m going or nothing,” Miguel Corujo said.

Orlando, Florida

“Unless you commit some type of heinous crime, then yes, then I think that those records should be turned over to the police, but if it’s something private like divorce or something like that, that’s ridiculous,” Gabay said.

“Our credit card records are public, our checking accounts are public and when you’re going through a divorce you’re life is under a microscope,” Silver said. “There truly is no privacy, it’s very hard to hide.”

Many people said they are surprised that a toll collection system can also register cheating hearts.

Having an Affair? Steer clear of the marital car

People having an affair in Italy would be well advised in future not to use their car for illicit assignations.

An Italian judge yesterday ruled that wives or husbands who suspect marital infidelity are entitled under the law to bug their spouse’s car in the search for incriminating evidence.

The ruling arose in Brescia, northern Italy, where a private detective agency specialising in infidelity cases offered to plant hidden microphones and satellite tracking devices “in a couple of hours” in the cars of suspected spouses, at a cost of up to €1,500 (£1,000).

After some of the devices were found police charged 22 people – including private detectives and mechanics as well as the jealous spouses – with “invasion of privacy”. Yesterday, however, Lorenzo Benini, a judge in Brescia, ruled that to plant bugging devices in a car was “not a criminal offence”.

He said: “However disconcerting this may be, I find no penalty under the law for intercepting private conversations or communications in a vehicle. It is not illegal.”

The judge said that the law forbidding bugging applied only to homes, with a penalty of up to four years in prison.

Judge Benini acknowledged that the loophole was “a cause for alarm”, but he insisted that “the law is the law”. He said that he was obliged to acquit the 22 accused, but suggested that parliament might “take another look” at privacy laws in Italy and tighten them up.

In a country where corruption is rife, there are fears that the loophole could also be exploited by those engaged in other forms of espionage, industrial or political.

The wrath – and torment – of cheated husbands or wives is a constant theme of Italian cinema, from Divorce, Italian Style with Marcello Mastroianni to Amore mio, aiutami (Help Me, My Love) starring Monica Vitti.

In a separate case yesterday, the Court of Cassation, the highest court of appeal in Italy, ordered an “obsessively jealous” husband not only to leave the marital home but to move to another town altogether to stop him trying to control his wife’s every move.

The court said that the husband, named only as Roberto under privacy laws, had in effect imprisoned his wife, Maria, by forbidding her to leave their home at Lecce, in Puglia, southern Italy, and installing a video surveillance camera outside the house to make sure that she obeyed.

It said that he had also obliged her to have his mother to stay in the house whenever he spent a night away.

The appeal judges rejected his plea that his actions arose from his “loving attentions” toward his wife. Corriere della Sera said that the two judgments showed that despite Italy’s reputation for a relaxed attitude to matters of the heart, marital jealousy was “stronger than ever”.

A survey in Donna Moderna, a women’s magazine, said that 92 per cent of Italian women would not forgive their husband for betraying them. The survey was taken after the resignation this week of Cosimo Mele, a Catholic MP from the Christian Democrat party, after it emerged that he had spent a night at a luxury Rome hotel suite with two prostitutes, one of whom was taken to hospital with a cocaine overdose.

Only 8 per cent of women questioned said that they would be understanding if their husband or partner were caught in a similar situation. Mr Mele, who denies taking drugs, blames his behaviour on the loneliness of life as a politician.

The Rome prosecutor has opened an inquiry into the case, saying that the prostitutes’ accounts of events differed in key respects from that of Mr Mele.

Home bugs

In Britain law enforcement agencies are required to seek warrants to place bugs or taps but private citizens are not. This opens the door to all forms of espionage whether personal. professional or political. So Britain’s cheating spouses must also be careful where they conduct their secret trysts. But would-be spies must weigh the risks – victims do have recourse to the civil courts under European legislation

Grandma killed daughter-in-law over affair

LONDON – A 70-year-old British grandmother is facing life imprisonment after being convicted today of the “honour killing” of her son’s wife who she murdered after luring her to India.

Bachan Athwal, 70, who has 16 grandchildren, is believed to be one of the oldest women ever to be convicted of murder in England. Her son was also found guilty of murder.

They will be sentenced on Sept. 19.

The two killed Sikh Heathrow Airport worker Surjit Kaur Athwal, who disappeared in December 1998 after she decided to walk out of her arranged marriage.

Bachan Athwal, a mother-of six, was furious about her daughter-in-law’s plans to leave, which she believed would bring disgrace on the family, London’s Old Bailey court heard.

The pensioner was said to have told one family member that any divorce proceedings “would happen over my dead body”.

The Customs officer was lured to India by her mother-in-law, and her minibus driver husband Sukhdave Singh Athwal, 43, on the pretext of attending family weddings but was instead strangled.

The alarm was raised after the 27-year-old victim failed to return to her home in Hayes, west London. Her body, believed to be somewhere in the Punjab area in India, has never been found.

The verdict is the second involving honour killings in Britain this month. Iraqi Kurd Mahmod Mahmod was jailed for life last week for murdering his daughter after discovering she was having an affair.

“This case highlights how seriously we treat any murder or violence, regardless of the motive, whether it be for financial gain or in the name of so called honour,” said Detective Chief Inspector Clive Driscoll of London’s Specialist Crime Directorate after Thursday’s verdict.

“It is the culmination of over eight years’ work by the Metropolitan Police, and the determination of Surjit’s family, to see the perpetrators brought to justice,” he said.

During the three month trial, the court heard that Surjit’s 10-year arranged marriage — which she entered when she was just 16 — was on the rocks and she was desperate to leave it.

She had asked for a divorce and was having an affair with a colleague. Athwal and her son were so aggrieved they plotted to “get rid of her”, the jury was told.

“She was a vivacious young girl, was Surjit … and she had developed a somewhat Westernised-style of life,” prosecutor Michael Worsley said. She cut her hair short, smoked cigarettes and drank alcohol.

“They were Sikhs, and for the girl to have an affair was obviously something dreadful. Eventually feelings against her boiled over.”

Today is Private Eye Day.

New York, NY 10019 July 23 2007

Today is Private Eye Day.

As the author of an infidelity book packed with hundreds of telltale signs of infidelity that suspicious spouses and significant others can find on their own, infidelity expert Ruth Houston rarely recommends using a private eye to catch a cheating mate.

Houston’s book, Is He Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs documents practically every known sign of infidelity, including the subtle signs most people usually overlook And they can all be found using nothing more than your own eyes and ears, your personal knowledge of their mate, and the information in her book.

However, Houston, concedes certain circumstances warrant a suspicious mate hiring a private investigator despite the facts that there are many telltale signs they can easily discover for themselves.

Houston, founder of says, “Some individuals should never attempt to find proof of infidelity on their own. Certain character traits or personal idiosyncrasies will cause people to view even the most innocent behavior as a sign of infidelity. So rather than jumping to conclusions or falsely accusing a spouse or significant other of cheating, it may be best to employ the services of a private eye.”

According to statistics, 85% of women who had a “gut feeling” that their husbands were cheating, turned out to be right. However, Houston cautions, “Intuition can be a very powerful indicator of infidelity, be sure you know the difference between intuition and insecurity. Your suspicious may be totally without merit. Falsely accusing your mate of infidelity can be just as damaging to your relationship as infidelity itself. So be sure you’re on solid ground.”

Houston says your suspicions may turn out to be groundless if you:

• You are suspicious by nature.
• You have a natural distrust of the opposite sex.
• You have issues with jealousy.
• You are emotionally insecure.
• You suffer from low-self esteem.
• You are paranoid.
• You have an overly active imagination.

“If any of the seven statements above apply to you, then you should probably hire a detective to check out your mate. It will be impossible for you to remain objective or open-minded about whatever you find.” says Houston. “You should also hire a licensed private eye if you require court admissible proof. A professional can conduct a fair and impartial investigation, and provide you with the documented proof you need.”

Private investigators are not cheap. Expect to spend several hundred dollars depending on the service you require. Hourly fees start at around $75 and can go as high as $200 or more per hour. Most require a retainer up front equivalent to a minimum of several hours work.

If you’re reluctant to spend that kind of money, then your best bet is to get a copy of Houston’s book, Is He Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs because it lists practically every known sign of infidelity. Why pay someone to find out something you can easily discover yourself? The signs are conveniently grouped into 21 major categories so you can easily find the signs that apply to your mate. Despite the title, most of the signs in the book apply to cheating women, as well as cheating men.

Even if you decide to hire a private eye, Houston still recommends that you first do a little digging on your own. The more basic information you can provide the investigator with, the more quickly and efficiently he or she can work, and the lower your final cost will be. Look for a licensed investigator who specializes in infidelity, spousal, matrimonial, or domestic investigations, as they’re sometimes called.

For more information about infidelity, cheating mates, signs of infidelity and extramarital affairs, visit

About Ruth Houston:

New York-based infidelity expert Ruth Houston is the founder of and the author of Is He Cheating on You – 829 Telltale Signs. Frequently called on by the media to comment on infidelity issues in the news, Ruth Houston been quoted in USA Today, the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, the Los Angeles Times, the New York Post, Cosmopolitan, Chatelaine, iVillage, MSN Lifestyle, Reuters, UPI, AP, ABC and numerous other print and online media. She has been a guest on The Today Show, Good Day New York, CNN, 1010WINS, Fox News, NBC News, ABC News, BBC, CBC and over 320 radio and TV talk shows worldwide.

To interview infidelity expert Ruth Houston, call 718 592-6039 or e-mail InfidelityExpert @

Ruth Houston (
Infidelity Expert and Author
Lifestyle Publications
P.O. Box 730797
Elmhurst, NY 11373
Phone : 718 592-6039